Character File: The Narrator

"The master of your fate... or at least that's what it said in the job description."

First appearance: Season One, Epilogue Three - Troubles In Town

"So... I guess we come back around to you."

I suppose we do.

"Now, the world wants to know... Who are you, anyway?"

I believe I'm entitled to my anonymity, thank you. I'm just the Narrator. That's all you need to know.

"So according to this... wait a second, your first appearance was three epilogues in? Who was narrating the first two?"

That would be me. I've been around since the very beginning, even in the "lost epilogues." It just wasn't until Epilogue Three that I was actually promoted to character status. Let me tell you, it's a lot more interesting than having to just read scripts in a dramatic voice. The script becomes a guideline, not necessarily the word of God. It's the difference between having to wear a business suit and being allowed to wear a propeller beanie to work.

I suppose it makes up for some of the utterly ridiculous scripts these guys come up with.

"Quite an analogy there... So, could you tell me a little more about yourself?"

... If I didn't know better, I'd think you were coming on to me.

"..."

Just messing with you. Well... it's really hard to describe myself. I'm told I seem to have a case of multiple personality disorder, but I suspect that's just on a writer-by-writer basis. The curse of being a character, I guess. I'll admit I do enjoy the occasional pop culture reference. I suppose that's enough of a constant to count.

So far, I've heard that I've been: morally supportive, sarcastic, impatient, forgetful, and a little bit of a jerk. Can't really argue too much with those. Offscreen... well, I'm sure you could pull some kind of conclusion from this lengthy interview.

"I see... so is there anything else you'd like to say on yourself before we continue on?"

Yeah, just a little note. A raise would be nice.